INSIDE THE TICKING MOMENTS OF A PANDEMIC– II –Linda Lee
Greene, April 1, 2020, Columbus, Ohio, USA
A TALE OF TWO LIVES
Fifteen months ago, I was with my kid sister, Suzee, as she succumbed
to a long illness. She was a radiant creature of 63 years of age. In her final
weeks, family and friends gathered at her side and stayed with her, myself
included. I came away from the experience saddened and distraught, but also enlightened
in an utterly unexpected way.
I was
an adolescent when Suzee was born. The first time I held her in my arms, she
was three days old. I was privy to the opening three decades of her life from
an intimate standpoint that can only be provided in the fold of a birth-family.
My concept of her was pretty much set in stone. I would describe Suzee as quiet;
shy; private. She was a loner. She stood apart. The spotlight held little
interest for her. She would prefer to steal away in a book. She loved animals
more than people.
Thirty years before her death,
Suzee relocated from Ohio to the Gulf Coast of Florida, and there she forged a
new life for herself. Our sister, Sherri, and I had remained in Ohio. While visits,
letters, and telephone calls were consistently passed among us, there is just
so much people can know about the nitty gritty of one another’s life under such
circumstances. The bottom line was that Suzee got away from us, to a large
degree. Separated from the support of her early foundation, as well as out from
under its scrutiny and stresses, she remade herself. While I was with her in
her final three weeks, I was stunned to see that the Suzee I knew was only one,
narrow dimension of her, and I saw it through the dynamic at work between her
and the people she had attracted to herself in Florida.
The shy, quiet, private Suzee had
grown into a deeply loved, very popular, and sought-after person. She had
evolved into a witty chatterbox and a raconteur. She had become a talented artist.
She was a property and a business owner. She was an advocate for animals and a
minister of their care. She didn’t have children of her own, but in her role as
a business person, she sheltered, guided, and mentored many young people. One
after another, people told me that Suzee was the greatest woman they had ever
known. What a revelation all this was to me!
Had I not been with her during her
final weeks, I would have missed knowing the complete Suzee. And more
importantly, Suzee would not have had the chance to reveal herself to me. She
yearned to see the amazement in my eyes. She longed for my validation. She needed
me to endorse her achievements. She wanted so much for me to open my mind about
her. Otherwise, the whole of Suzee’s story would have gone undiscovered. She
was desperate that I get her story right because she knew I would write it.
My experience with Suzee circles
back to our current situation with Coronavirus. I find myself lamenting the
missed opportunities for people everywhere to examine and likely to edit the
final chapter of the life of their dying loved-ones. Souls are passing away all
alone. Confessions, apologies, secrets, successes, failures, ideas, histories, heroics,
revelations, statements of love, and more, are going unsaid. So many vital stories
are vanishing, are getting lost, are adrift in the ethers.
I hope that after Coronavirus, some
sort of archive of the stories will emerge. Lacking that, I yearn for something
akin to the Viet Nam wall scribed with the names of our precious brothers and
sisters across the world who lost their lives to the virus.© #STAYHOME
#SAVELIVES #INTHISTOGETHER
**A personal note to my readers: Muse kicked me out of my
cave and told me to get back to my keyboard. It is a struggle, but I will take
a stab at following her lead whenever she deigns to whisper in my mind’s ear.